Wall mart mayhem
by soccergirl777
Summary: What happens when you accidently lock five vampires and one human in Wall mart? B/E Em/R J/A read and review! rated M for future chapters
1. Chapter 1

I definitely Own twilight!!

B/POV:

"Bella honey please don't cry" moaned Edward.

"I wouldn't cry if Emmett hadn't got us stuck here….AND IM ON MY FUCKING PERIOD!!!" I sobbed.

Yes I was trapped in one of the most annoyingly cheep ass stores in the entire world. Wall mat! I really wish I was a vampire so I could rip Emmett's annoying head off!

"Isn't this great you guys!" squealed Emmett, "We can do whatever we want in here!"

"Ya if you like being stuck in a store that smells like plastic all the time." Said Jasper sarcastically.

" OH MY FUCKING GOD WERE SURROUNDED BY CHEAP ASS CLOTHES!" Alice and Rose screamed cringing away from the cheap fabric.

"Edward I want to go home." I looked up into the golden eyes I loved with my best puppy dog face.

"Bella lets let Emmett have his fun then we can break the doors down and go home."

"Fine."

I don't even want to know what Emmett will do in this place.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

E/POV

"HEY YOU GUYS COME LOOK AT THIS." We heard Emmett scream from the other side of the store.

Great my idiot of a brother found a new toy to play with. I reluctantly pulled my girl friend to the other side of the store. She looks so cute when she pouts like that.

"Remind me why we are doing this instead of running for it?" she asked.

" Because Emmett would never forgive us if we ran for it."

" Ugh stupid vampire brothers." She murmured under her breath.

I chuckled to myself. I knew she only did this because she wanted to be on Emmett's good side.

When we got to the other side of the store with Alice and rose (scared of the cheap clothes) and Jasper ( scared of what Emmett was up to) all of our mouths about hit the floor.

"What do you think of my awesome party balloons?" he asked with a smirk.

He had blown up about 20 different condoms and hung them all around the aisle.

"WHAT THE HELL EMMETT? THAT IS SUCH A WASTE!!" screamed Bella from next to me.

We all looked at her in surprise. My sweet little Bella was worried about condoms?!?

"What will all the little girls and boys that want to get intimate do?!?" she looked way to furious to blush.

Emmett just sat there and stared at Bella. Then we all burst out in laughter. I kissed Bella on the cheek and we all went to look for something else to do.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

B/POV

Edward and I were looking around for something to do when we heard strange noises coming from the aisle next to ours.

" Oh ken you look so handsome to night."

That was weird the voice was a false attempt at a preppy chick.

" Barbie I never thought I would ever see you again."

Ok this was getting just flat out weird. Edward and I stared at eachother for a while wen the voices started talking again.

"Oh barbie…"

"Oh ken…"

An then the sounds of fake smooching.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A/POV

Rose and I were totally scared. I mean there were cheap items every where! Cheap jewelry, cheap clothes, even cheap perfume! God I hated wall mart. And I hated Bella for not freaking out with us!

"where is every one?" I asked rose as we hid from all the cheap crap.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?!?" she practically screamed.

All of a sudden I had a horrible vision that had to do with me rose and cheap clothes…

"RUN!!!" I yelled at rose.

But we were too late. It was pretty scary watching the three psychotic vampires (and one human) stalking towards us with all of there infected cheap merchandise.

"Come near me with that cheap ass shit and I will rip you all limb from limb!!" shrieked rose.

I was way to scared to say anything.

They tied us up with some superly strong rope and changed us into the horribly cheap clothes.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

B/POV

This was starting to get good! Except for the fact that my sugar cravings are coming back! Wait we have the entire store to our selves! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

"HEY CULLENS COME HEAR!!" I yelled. Even though I didn't need to it was still better.

In a matter of seconds they had gathered around me Alice and Rose smelling like soap (haha cause they had to get the stinky Hannah Montana makeup off!) and looking extremely disgruntled, jasper and Emmett looking like a couple of kids at Disney land, and my Edward just as beautiful as ever.

"I want you to try something!" they all looked at me searchingly then followed me to the candy aisle. DUN DUN DUN!!

I went over to the shelves and stared at all of there glory. Then picked up some pixy stix and a can of monster energy drink and mixed the two together.

"Emmett have you ever tried an energy drink?" I asked innocently.

"Bella I don't need to read your mind to know what you are thinking." Said Edward warningly with a very scared look on his face.

"Shut up Eddie! No sweet Bella I haven't." he replied just as innocently.

"Then this is gonna be even better!" I handed over the drink and watched him chug it down.

"Oh god this is gonna be a disaster!" said Edward in a muffled voice seeing as he had hid his face in my hair.

"Whoa!!" yelled Emmett after the last drop had entered his mouth.

Then it happened.

His grin faded and became a manic expression. His eyes bugged out of his head. And then he started to scream….

"I'M A BARBIE GIRL IN THE BARBIE WORLD  
LIFE IN PLASTIC, IT'S FANTASTIC  
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, UNDRESS ME EVERYWHERE  
IMAGINATION, LIFE IS YOUR CREATION

COME ON, BARBIE, LET'S GO PARTY!!" he was trying to tug on roses arm to get her to sing with him but she just stood there stock still with her mouth wide open.

Soon jasper Alice and rose had gotten there drinks and were singing along with him. All of them looked like they were psychotic!

Soon after about an hour of the same words over and over again the effects of the monsters wore off and they sat on the floor in the middle of the trashed aisle and asked what was happening.

"Well you see like drugs the effects of the drink wear off and you loose the sugar high." I said in a brave attempt at my normal voice. (I was holding back laughter.)

Edward just keeled over and started laughing his ass off! I couldn't help but join in.

All the others did was giggle feebly.


	6. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

B/POV

I was starting to get tired and cranky while Emmett and jasper were having the time of there lives. I was just about to complain to Edward when he put his hand to my mouth and stared at the entrance doorway. All of the vampires had froze, nostrils flared, staring at the entrance.

Then I heard it too and I knew that this was going to end very badly…

"Dogs!" snarled Rose in a low voice.

"Hey ,guys, um I think we should just leave him alo…" I said before something grabbed me and carried me to the other side of the store.

"JACOB BLACK PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!!!" he just flashed me a dazzling and extremely confusing smile.(I still hadn't figured out my feelings for him)

"No Bells I don't think I will!" he said in a slurred voice…

"JAKE!! Are you drunk?!?" I asked in a surprised voice. But he didn't get a chance to answer cause the next second I was taken out of his grip and set back on the ground. Then all I heard was a horrible crunch.

"EDWARD!! Why did you have to break his nose!?! He's drunk he doesn't know what he's doing! "

"No Bella he does know what he is doing. I just had to knock some sense back into him." He replied calmly.

"Stupid bloodsucker!! You broke my nose!" Yelled Jacob from the floor.

"That was sort of the point." Edward replied coldly.

"God I hate my life!" Jacob suddenly screamed sitting up, "you stupid vampires get whatever you want and I'm fed up with it!" and with that he gathered me up and kissed me roughly.

I tried to get away but his grip was like an iron clasp. Suddenly his lips turned to a more soft and gentle touch. I didn't want to kiss back so I just stood there. When he stopped a fist flew straight into his stomach.

"Thank you Edward." I said as I kissed him on the cheek and gave Jake on last withering look.

"Whatever you know you liked it Bella." Said Jake massaging his stomach.

"Nope." I said with an emphasis on the p.

And with that we all left the store laughing and Jake muttering as he returned to the forest.

"Hey Bella what do you want to do next time we get stuck somewhere?" asked Emmett in a mocking voice.

"well whatever it is and where ever it is I know for sure that it wont be on my fucking period again." I muttered as a reply.

THE END!!


	7. Chapter 8

Authors note!!!

Omg!!! This is so un cool! I just read my story for the first time from your point of view and I messed it all up!! I am such an epic failure!! The chapters were supposed to be longer than that but I guess it didn't down load all the way!! If any one has any advice on what I can do to prevent this from happening again I would very much appreciate it! Thank you everyone! :

Signed,

Deathqueen101


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